When you realize your limits, you’re higher able to protect your mental and physical health. If you’re in search of a approach to set your personal personal boundaries, it may be a good suggestion first to think about what type of boundary you’re setting. This is especially true for people who could have lower emotional intelligence (EQ). And usually, they’re the individuals who benefit the most from having personal boundaries clearly communicated to them. When two folks know what to expect from each other, it could be simpler to avoid misunderstandings. Most individuals will respect boundaries, but a minority ignore them.
You might have heard of people establishing wholesome boundaries, but what does that even look like? Well, for starters, a healthy boundary can seem like plenty of things. If a good friend wants you to stay out later than you’d like and you decide instead to belief your intestine and go home, that’s a healthy boundary. If your significant different has become too demanding of your time and also you ask for some personal house, that, too, is a wholesome boundary. Setting personal and emotional boundaries lets you develop a pure trust in your self, based on marriage and family therapist Saba Lurie.
But with some practice, your discomfort with setting boundaries will subside. When you can manage your nervousness about dealing with points head-on in more useful methods than prior to now, you’ll know you’re practicing wholesome boundaries. Personal boundaries discuss with the foundations or limits that a person establishes to identify affordable, protected, and permissible methods for different people to behave in course of them. These boundaries additionally determine the appropriate response when somebody passes those limits. Personal boundaries are important for self-care and self-respect, and they assist maintain wholesome relationships.
It might assist to start out by taking small steps with folks you trust. For instance, let’s say you’ve a detailed pal who tends to talk for hours on the telephone. When they subsequent name, you can set a boundary by telling them you’ll be able to only stay on the cellphone for 30 minutes, then politely finish the phone name when the time is up.
Whether through individual remedy or group assist, you’ll build skills to point out up authentically in your relationships and break the cycle of burnout. Once you determine out the ideas, what to do comes extra naturally. Enforcing boundaries is an act of self-respect and is essential on your psychological and emotional well-being.
Instead of using imprecise or hesitant language, be direct when stating your boundaries. If somebody incessantly calls late at evening, saying, “I’d prefer when you didn’t name me so late” leaves room for misinterpretation. A stronger strategy is, “I don’t take calls after 9 PM. I need that time to relaxation.” This leaves little doubt about your expectations while sustaining a respectful tone. Discuss and set up fundamental rules for behaviour and co-operation, limitation and expectations. A clear understanding about what all people needs, desires, or expects is essential. Record these guidelines and keep them in an accessible location.
It’s important to acknowledge when you don’t need extra input and be snug with stopping it. Sometimes, I used to overcomplicate things or add too many details, which only confused the state of affairs. For example, if I tackle too many responsibilities without delay, I’m going to really feel careworn and drained. If you may have a colleague who routinely violates your work boundaries, don’t hesitate to get human sources concerned. Online remedy permits you to communicate to a licensed therapist within the consolation of your home.
Remember that narcissists have spent a lifetime learning tips on how to devalue and benefit from others. Narcissism is a strong psychological phenomenon primarily based on distorted views of self, others, and the world. Narcissists hunger for consideration and approval to counteract deep, unconscious feelings of emptiness and unworthiness. As a result, they endlessly take a look at to see what they’ll get away with. Narcissists use scrutiny or intimidation to make others second-guess themselves. But then you definitely might say, “Well, was it an excellent friendship to start with?
How would your life change should you had been capable of keep personal boundaries? This contains stopping folks from overstepping into your private space, as nicely as sticking to the non-public boundaries that you simply set for your self later. Boundaries can fall under our emotional needs, our physical house, sexual safety, our capability to work without battle, and the proper use of our time and belongings. However, even if you realize that you want to have emotional boundaries, it doesn’t imply they’re simple to create. It could be challenging to interrupt unhealthy behavioral patterns that may come from supporting your associate regardless of the influence it has on you. Issues such as concern of abandonment, insecure attachment styles, and low shallowness can create further obstacles.
Her dissertation evaluated the impression of a mindfulness-based group intervention for highschool females fighting disordered consuming and body image issues. In the final decade, Dr. Scotti has deepened her understanding of Eastern spiritual traditions through self-study and participation in various meditation and mindfulness retreats and workshops. Genuine kindness often requires courageous honesty, together with saying issues others don’t want to hear. Saying no or setting limits may make you are feeling uncomfortable in the second, especially if you’re a people-pleaser.
Boundaries are the limits we set for ourselves so as to defend our physical, emotional, and psychological well-being. They are behaviors that are — and are not — acceptable to us. It helps to consider them as invisible strains that separate us from others and assist us really feel protected, revered, and in management. Unreasonable habits can stem from many different circumstances in an individual’s life. They could be going via a highly stressful time, similar to an abusive or depressing marriage, instability at work, or well being challenges. Or, a person might be experiencing symptoms of a mental health condition that impacts how they method interpersonal conditions, like a persona dysfunction or depression.
Each animal may be very totally different in nature, requiring a different type of fence (boundary line) to maintain them protected and people round them protected. We have also heard boundaries being referred to as a house with a fence. Some people are allowed simply within the yard, while others aren’t allowed to cross the fence, whereas others are at the kitchen table with you. I pray this post encourages your heart as I talk about emotional boundaries and why we want them. I know they are hard to set, not to mention hard to keep in place.
Deliberately apply self-care every day and start encouraging yourself quite than criticizing yourself. But except you problem these messages, you’ll continue to really feel unworthy and undeserving of love and respect. We all have boundaries, but many people are not speaking them to others or not setting penalties when they are revered. But there’s a giant difference between assertion and aggression. We can get up for ourselves and do so respectfully, honestly, and calmly. When we’re asserting ourselves, we purpose for affirming our beliefs and opinions somewhat than trying to regulate the other individual.
Your mental well being care must be efficient, straightforward, and enjoyable. We’ll help match you with a therapist you probably can vibe with. Your companion might need some pushback or reservations about your boundaries. They might have questions on why you’re setting them in the same place. Take time to reply their questions and clarify the whys, hows, and whats.
This could be difficult if you’re used to putting everyone else’s wants first. You may need to spend a while reflecting on what makes you’re feeling happy in a relationship and what makes you feel uncomfortable. It could be useful to read this article on bettering your self-awareness. And whereas we cant stop folks from appearing like this, we will study to set clear boundaries and take care of ourselves.
People could feel a way of obligation to meet others’ expectations, put others’ wants before their very own, or concern being perceived as selfish. Guilt and obligation could make it difficult to prioritize private well-being and establish clear boundaries. Boundaries are the foundation of healthy relationships. They ensure that interactions are respectful, balanced, and based mostly on mutual consent. Healthy boundaries promote clear communication, belief, and healthy dynamics, permitting for meaningful and satisfying connections.
There will be individuals who react negatively to your setting boundaries. People who take benefit of you saying sure on a regular basis will probably reply with anger or guilt-trips to attempt to persuade you to bend your boundaries for them. Remind your self that their discomfort doesn’t mean your boundary is wrong. Furthermore, you might find you lose pals and connections as a result of they have been only utilizing you on your sure. At Rosebud Psychotherapy, I assist girls such as you learn how to set boundaries that really feel empowering—not guilt-inducing.
Its tempting to return to passivity when others dont like your boundaries. However, even when your boundaries provoke anger or resistance, it doesnt imply you shouldnt set them. It means that you should ask for help and take steps to keep your self secure (such as not being alone with a person who’s threatening, aggressive, or volatile). Sometimes it helps to do not neglect that when people resist your boundaries, its confirmation that the boundaries are wanted. Self-boundaries also contain managing your thoughts and emotions. If you are usually overly critical of your self, apply self-compassion and set boundaries around negative self-talk.
These are a few boundaries that may assist those seeking a peaceable life with pals and coworkers who share related values. We all have our personal unique wants, so some of these boundaries might not apply to everyone, and that’s okay! Start forming your individual agency boundaries so that you can eliminate all of the drama, trouble, and stress out of your surroundings. That’s their cue to start in search of an setting that values communication and progress simply as a lot as they do.
Time with a romantic associate should be balanced with time for pals, household, and your self. Notice the daring elements accomplish all three elements of deflection. Not everybody will understand or respect your boundaries the first time. It’s necessary to face agency in your determination whereas kindly reminding them of your wants when needed.
This self-respect can lead to increased shallowness and confidence. Establishing boundaries lets you defend your psychological well-being. Setting emotional and mental boundaries allows you to engage in self-care, course of your feelings without external interference, and hold your thoughts clear from the negative influence of others. By setting clear boundaries, you’ll find a way to cut back the emotional strain of overcommitting or saying sure when you actually need to say no. Boundaries help defend your time and power, guaranteeing that you don’t burn out from attempting to please others or from taking up too much.
If you’ve been working with out boundaries, change might really feel uncomfortable at first. But with time and practice, you’ll discover that boundaries are an act of self-care, not selfishness. By prioritizing your needs, you’re finally teaching others how to value you—and exhibiting them it’s okay to do the identical.
The best part about boundaries is that you get to make them up for yourself. It’s as a lot as you, and only you, to discover out those boundaries and set them with these around you. We acknowledge that we live and work on the land of the Gadigal individuals of the Eora Nation. Many clients from Glendale, Surprise, and Avondale have found readability through therapy.
If the journey becomes overly fraught or leads to heightened conflict, in search of professional help isn’t just advisable, but may be essential. Therapists and counselors, with their specialised coaching and expertise, can provide the much-needed steerage and assist to navigate these complexities. Despite its many benefits, setting boundaries can be challenging. It could be met with resistance, especially if the family dynamics are such that boundaries have not historically been respected.
The importance of personal house in sustaining one’s psychological well being cannot be overemphasized. It is a buffer zone that lets you perform without the interference of the tough particular person. Boundaries, by way of Boundary Theory, refer to the invisible lines that demarcate our personal space, our psychological comfort zones, and our sense of self. They are the guidelines, guidelines, or limits we set up to establish protected, permissible methods for others to behave towards us and the way we are going to reply when these strains are crossed.
Respecting emotional boundaries means validating the feelings of others and ensuring you respect their ability to absorb emotional data. The most extreme violations lead to severe physical abuse or neglect. They make expectations clear so both events know what to anticipate from each other and how they should behave. Without boundaries, people could reap the advantages of you because you haven’t set limits or communicated what conduct is OK and what isn’t. Telling someone to not communicate to you during a hard conversation can sound dismissive of their feelings, especially if they’re feeling unheard.
You say, “I’d like to complete my thought. I’d respect it if you may take heed to mine first.” This sets a boundary round respectful communication and valuing completely different viewpoints. A lot of knowledge will let you know that setting boundaries means saying no to others. One survey even mentioned that nearly 3 in 5 (58%) Americans have hassle saying “no” to others. For instance, throughout a manic episode, you would possibly need to play financial superhero and quickly take charge of the bank card.
Putting boundaries into place can provide you again control over a scenario where others appear to have all the ability and the say over your consolation. Communicating what is “okay” and never “okay” is important to protect your physical and mental energy and guarantee your security. Part of enacting this type of boundary is to refuse to tackle the burden of the awkwardness, tension, or embarrassment of her conduct any longer. But in addressing your emotions, you’ve refused to tackle these feelings for both of you. In this way, you stay engaged in a relationship together with her in a boundaried means. Take some time to honor and acknowledge all of your emotions.
If someone oversteps a boundary however is generally type and loving, you can provide them the advantage of the doubt. Boundaries are limits and pointers that make clear how you behave towards different folks and what kind of therapy you anticipate and settle for in return. When you set a boundary, you draw a line between what is and isn’t OK in your relationships.
Knowing this helps you establish the place boundaries are needed. Time boundaries protect how you use your time and vitality. Saying “no” to additional work hours, limiting calls or texts after sure hours, or carving out time for self-care are examples of time boundaries. Respecting these helps prevent burnout and retains your schedule balanced. Understanding the varied types of healthy boundaries can help you in identifying conditions where you might want to ascertain more express boundaries. Mental boundaries are one other important side of self-care for highly sensitive folks.
Boundaries can also promote open discussions about needs, feelings, and expectations, so each individuals really feel valued and revered. They additionally help forestall misunderstandings and minimize down on resentment. If you’re trying to discover out when it’s time to set a boundary, listen to your intestine and tune into your physique. When you feel drained, resentful, or pressured to say yes to stuff you don’t actually want, these are indicators that your power and luxury are being compromised. Setting boundaries may be emotionally challenging, especially if you’re not used to putting yourself first.
Establishing healthy boundary situations ensures that our relationships are mutually trusting, supportive, and caring—even after we are confronted by challenges. Seek Support – If the process feels overwhelming, don’t hesitate to achieve out for help. A therapist can provide steerage and role-play tricky conversations with you. If you’re in search of a more basic introduction to boundary setting, try this video on setting boundaries that emphasizes the importance of getting assist whenever you need it.
Boundaries are formed by our life experiences, family dynamics, tradition, and the place we grew up, amongst many factors. Some individuals have inflexible, tight boundaries, the place they tend to maintain others at a distance and avoid close relationships. Boundaries are not about shutting people out; they’re about constructing relationships rooted in mutual respect.
If you tend to neglect your personal wants because of this, try to remind yourself that you may be higher able to look after others if you finish up rested, wholesome, and emotionally balanced. This may also prolong to feeling guilty when setting boundaries. Setting boundaries is an important part of constructing and maintaining wholesome relationships. By defining and speaking your limits, you promote respect, trust, and effective communication. Remember that boundaries aren’t about controlling others however about caring for your self and ensuring that your relationships are balanced and fulfilling.
Saying “no” used to really feel actually onerous for me, especially if I didn’t wish to hurt anyone’s emotions. It might really feel uncomfortable at first, however with follow, it turns into simpler, and the advantages are clear. It may assist to work through the classes, considering interactions which have made you uncomfortable in the past and how establishing boundaries might have helped.
With basketball, it’s sidelines, free-throw lines, three-point strains, and extra. And in many sports, the clock serves as a time boundary, delineating quarters, periods, or halves, and perhaps extra time. Boundaries can present you more meaningful relationships with different people.
Intelligent folks set this agency boundary to maintain up management over their very own lives and schedules. John Feldman, Senior Communications Specialist at Insperity, emphasizes the importance of separating work from personal time, particularly for remote employees. Maintaining a transparent boundary between the two is crucial for both well-being and performance. When this person permits time to relaxation and recharge, their mental and physical well being enhance, relationships thrive, and work quality stays high. Having a continuing overlap between work and private time can lead to stress, disengagement, and eventual burnout. Think of how other people in your life assert their boundaries.
Most of our fears are perceived based mostly on misperceptions and are overgeneralized. Make an inventory of boundaries that are overdue in your life. Setting boundaries requires that you take accountability and are available to phrases with a harsh truth—you’re the one who has been crossing your personal boundaries. Self-love, then again, is our method to present appreciation for the gift of life.
Setting boundaries can really feel difficult at first, however with time, it becomes easier to face up on your needs. Remember that you’re not being egocentric or unreasonable—setting boundaries is an act of self-respect and emotional self-care. We are most familiar with bodily boundaries (the sensation of someone getting too near your face) but our emotional/psychological boundaries train different folks tips on how to treat us. Essentially, emotional boundaries refer to behavioral limits that we place to protect ourselves from being manipulated, harm or violated by others.
You might consider boundaries as one thing like a property line or “brick wall” used to maintain folks out. Jeff Campbell is a devoted father to three amazing kids, an avid blogger, foodie, former chief for Whole Foods Market for 20 years, would-be musician, and training martial artist. He presently runs 11 websites and helps over 500,000 people each and every month through his weblog posts. Think about what good belongings you need out of your connections with others.
It’s essential to take care of my very own feelings before serving to others with theirs. For instance, I may take a step back if someone is getting too close, or I’ll shake my head to point out I’m not snug with something. It’s necessary to set digital boundaries, especially with all of the apps and messages we get. But I’ve discovered that I don’t owe anybody a long rationalization. Taking care of myself means I could be there for others in a better means. Practice prioritizing your well-being, it’s one of the best factor you are capable of do for your self and people around you.
Here are some tricks to have a productive dialog that can assist a healthy friendship. Clear and assertive communication is important for setting boundaries that others understand and respect. But let’s be real—this half can feel a bit scary (are you a folks pleaser already panicking?). Practicing what you wish to say and tips on how to say it will enhance your chances of successfully setting a boundary.
Maybe there was enough room for two folks on that door, but did Jack ask Rose to scoot over? Don’t snicker, as a result of I’m pretty positive you’re shivering on this water additionally. Enforcing boundaries teaches others the way to respect you and reinforces your commitment to self-care. In collectivist families, shut ties between particular person members are encouraged and prioritized.
Some people depart me feeling drained as a substitute of energized. Setting this boundary helps me stay focused alone decisions and avoid feeling overwhelmed by too many opinions. Money is usually a difficult matter with family members, but I’ve realized that setting monetary boundaries is essential. I’ll take into consideration completely different conditions where I might must set a boundary, like telling someone I can’t hang around or I’m too tired to speak.
My wants had been acknowledged, each folks have been apologetic in regards to the damage carried out, and we moved ahead with bonds restored. Here are 8 things it helps to find out about setting and maintaining boundaries. Lately, my Instagram feed is awash with assertive reminders that it’s okay to set boundaries with folks, and even to unapologetically walk away from anybody who disrespects your boundaries. But in apply, it may be hard to know tips on how to set boundaries, not to mention preserve a boundary with a good friend, member of the family or colleague. Strong boundaries are an necessary part of each healthy relationship, whether it’s between romantic partners, pals, relations, or even coworkers and informal acquaintances. If you’re unsure the means to make your boundaries stick, learn on—we’ll give you some useful ideas, like the means to set sensible penalties for when someone crosses your limits.
This technique not only fosters empathy and compassion but in addition assists in setting wholesome boundaries. The benefits of assertiveness extend past skilled settings, enhancing private relationships and shallowness. Thus, mastering assertive communication is a crucial step in cultivating more healthy, more productive interactions – a skill worthy of pursuit.
If you worth high productiveness or privateness, you might set bodily boundaries with coworkers who tend to wander into your workspace. Your emotions matter, and we’re privileged to assist your psychological health journey. Our aim is to offer type, efficient, and well timed care. If you are not happy, let us know, and we’ll collaborate to find a solution inside one enterprise day.
Setting boundaries with difficult folks is crucial for maintaining your psychological, emotional, and bodily well being. By understanding your limits, communicating them assertively, and following by way of persistently, you can shield your peace and ensure healthier, extra respectful relationships. A therapist might help navigate advanced boundary-setting conditions, particularly when dealing with long-standing patterns of people-pleasing, guilt, or worry of confrontation. Therapy offers instruments to determine unhealthy relationship dynamics, reinforce private limits, and develop more healthy communication skills. It also helps people differentiate between affordable requests and emotional manipulation.
For example, we are able to set a maximum variety of hours we’ll work each week. We can restrict e mail to certain hours, with uncommon exceptions solely as wanted. It helps to plan ahead—and make sure to identify and give attention to our most necessary duties. Sometimes we’re not even aware of it, and we can’t get out of traps we don’t know we’re in. Feeling overwhelmed typically signifies a breach of our boundaries. Understanding and acting on our boundaries helps us feel more in control and balanced.
They help you stay true to yourself whereas nonetheless being open to connection. One way to set mental boundaries is by being assertive and direct in your communication. As a highly delicate particular person (HSP), you have a novel set of traits that allow you to course of and really feel issues deeply. As a energy, being delicate makes you highly empathic, creative, and can make you recognize all of the little things — those who others typically miss.
On a Wednesday, for instance, would possibly feel odd at first, however the point, based on Dr. Schuster, is to get into the behavior of actively prioritizing your self and your pursuits. Over time, this could make it easier to acknowledge that wanting to easily relaxation, say, or compensate for Love Island are completely valid reasons to refuse plans, she adds. Cognitive-behavioral remedy of borderline character dysfunction. Setting boundaries means you get to do extra of what you love and worth and less of what you don’t wish to do.
It won’t have something useful to say, so don’t fall for it. Your emotions are like instructions on the facet of the road. They will let you understand what areas that you must most likely examine somewhat further.
By maintaining emotional stability, you reinforce your boundaries and safeguard your peace of mind. By standing firm and following via, you reinforce your self-respect and ensure that your limits are taken critically. Every time you uphold a boundary, you strengthen your capability to protect your well-being and create more healthy interactions.
Recent research present that on-line and in-person CBT offer related outcomes. However, patients usually report a extra complete community of licensed suppliers, shorter wait occasions, and cheaper pricing scales utilizing teletherapy platforms. Self-care emphasizes the importance of addressing your private needs. Consider, for instance, that your thoughts and physique not only require but actually deserve sustenance and regular train to function at their peak.
If you resolve to live in a method that retains you pushed and tense, you are the one who lives with hypertension, larger susceptibility to sickness, and strained relationships. Naturally, some folks could have points together with your boundaries, but that doesn’t essentially imply you’re incorrect for sticking up for yourself or that your boundary is too strict, McDaniels says. Sometimes, they might also just be stunned with your new restrict and wish a while to adjust. It’s not uncommon for individuals to want two or three reminders to essentially perceive that you just imply business, Dr. Howes provides, so give them a little grace if you can.
At Olson Family Therapy, we perceive the significance of setting healthy boundaries in relationships. Our team of experienced therapists is right here to help you in navigating the complexities of establishing and maintaining boundaries that promote trust, respect, and fulfillment. Take the first step in path of building healthier relationships by reaching out to us today.
Stand agency in your boundaries, and keep in mind that your emotional and mental well-being are price protecting. First, you need to shift your perspective that setting boundaries is a egocentric factor to do and are available to the realization that connecting with others shouldn’t come at your individual expense. It is natural to seek acceptance and connection, and caring for others offers us a way of objective.
My childhood house sat on a busy street and it was fairly frequent to have folks come straight as much as our doorstep and simply ring the bell. It happened typically and sometimes it disrupted a family meal, quiet time or homework. They got here to the front door as a outcome of there have been no fences or gates to prevent them from crossing into our physical house, there have been no boundaries. As an grownup, I discovered myself moving into gated communities and buildings with 24/7 security. Although I really feel safer bodily, I generally still wrestle with setting emotional boundaries in my private relationships, also referred to as the artwork of claiming no without guilt.
Once you understand what your boundaries are, the subsequent step is to clearly talk them with others. Communication is at all times key to healthy relationships, so it’s no surprise communication is essential when it comes to healthy boundary setting. Do you find yourself stretched too thin, feeling resentful, or overwhelmed? Many ladies, particularly over forty, have spent years prioritizing others—whether in careers, relationships, or household. But setting boundaries isn’t egocentric; it’s essential for shielding your time, energy, and well-being. When setting and preserving boundaries in place, remember to trust your gut.
Whether with family members, a romantic companion, or colleagues, clear boundaries help protect your physical house and emotional wants. To follow setting wholesome boundaries, be direct about your needs while additionally considering the other person’s needs. For occasion, if you really feel resentful about always putting others earlier than your self, it could be an indication that new boundaries are necessary. This applies to all areas, including work, friendships, team interactions, and sexual partners.
There may even be different boundaries primarily based on a person’s culture. For example, some cultures find that sharing personal information is not acceptable at any time, while in other cultures, sharing may be encouraged at all times. Even a great boyfriend might unintentionally cross boundaries. Friendly chats are fine, but avoid sharing too many details about your personal lives.
These statements not solely communicate your wants explicitly but additionally set a tone of transparency that invitations understanding. Clear communication helps forestall misunderstandings and sets a great basis for mutual respect. Using assertive “I” statements, such as “I need…” or “I really feel uncomfortable when…” might help convey your message clearly while sustaining respect for the opposite particular person concerned. Effective communication is the cornerstone of wholesome boundaries.
For sensible reasons, it is very usually delayed too lengthy. Whether it’s a private or enterprise relationship, office, or another context; don’t let it go. Your time and energy are valuable, and never everyone deserves limitless access to them. If somebody repeatedly ignores your boundaries, it’s essential to take control of how much entry they have to you.
People are extra doubtless to react with defensiveness and not respect your boundaries if you attempt to set them with contempt or criticism. Imagine a good friend who consistently cancels plans on the last minute. It fails to communicate the underlying need for reliability and respect in the friendship.
For instance, you would possibly decide not to take accountability for a friend’s unhealthy mood or keep away from over-apologizing when you’re not at fault. Strong feelings within the warmth of the moment could cause an individual to behave in an unreasonable means. One doubtlessly effective approach is to go away them alone in a protected place for a couple of minutes to allow them to relax, or to ask them to take a stroll with you to permit them to clear their head. One instance could be expecting your spouse to consolation you after a minor disagreement with a pal whereas they’re within the early phases of grieving a significant loss of their life. A one that is unreasonable may be experiencing any variety of different circumstances. Their unreasonableness may stem from being paranoid, indignant, or traumatized or grieving a death or other loss, for instance.
You ought to commend yourself for being brave in navigating what feels right for you. And then as an adult, setting boundaries with people in your life could be tough if those individuals are used to you not having clear boundaries. There’s a common, valid fear that after you set boundaries, you may lose friendships, or relationships. It typically takes slightly trial and error to determine out what feels good to you. That doesn’t mean that you just shouldn’t, or that it’s too late or too exhausting to impose boundaries on your relationships.